Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Definitions (taken from funcage.com :P)

School:
A place where Parents pay and children play

Life Insurance:
A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

Nurse:
A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

Marriage:
It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters..

Divorce:
Future tense of Marriage.

Tears:
The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

Lecture:
An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either"

Conference:
The confusion of one human being multiplied by the number present.

Compromise:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece

Dictionary:
A place where success comes before work

Conference Room:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on

Father:
A banker provided by nature

Criminal:
A person no different from the rest....except that he/she got caught

Boss:
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early

Politician:
One who shakes your hand before elections and
your Confidence after

Doctor:
A person who holds your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

Classic:
Books, which people praise, but do not read.

Smile:
A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Office:
A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Yawn:
The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Etc.:
A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Committee:
Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

Experience:
The name men give to their mistakes.

Atom Bomb:
An invention to end all inventions.

Philosopher:
A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise

(taken from funcage.com :P)